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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
This person lives in a semi rural area.

We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore." ... :shock: ...
..........................................................................................:stupid:
From Kingman , KS .
 

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Some people shouldn't be allowed to have a telephone -- or even go out in public. Duh!
:stupid:
I know! They should pass an ordinance that no deer crossing highways is allowed except from 3 a.m. to 4 a.m. and the local lawmen could work as crossing guards during those hours. :mrgreen:
 

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New Diet!!!

Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for Athena the wonder dog at Wal-Mart and was about to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had, an elephant?

So since I'm retired, with little to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again. Although I probably shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified , she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's ass and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard!

WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.
:clap: :party: :D :shock:
 

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I probably should post this over on the Hillary thread, but...

Rosie O'Donnell finally said something I agree with. She said she has decided she will vote for President for "whoever has a v------" (insert word for female sexual organ).

Only she's having a problem trying to decide between Hillary and Edwards. :mrgreen:
 

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Re: New Diet!!!

babj615 said:
Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow.....I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard!
WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.
hahahhahhhahahahhhhhaaha that was funny as all hell.....
 

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Netfotoj said:
I probably should post this over on the Hillary thread, but...

Rosie O'Donnell finally said something I agree with. She said she has decided she will vote for President for "whoever has a v------" (insert word for female sexual organ).

Only she's having a problem trying to decide between Hillary and Edwards. :mrgreen:
Hmmmm......

Guess she votes for Edwards then, cuz I think Hillary has a Dick!!!!

:party: :party:
 
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